Once the administration had been completed, the woman turned to me. She was perhaps late thirties, blonde highlights, long straight skirt in a vibrant purple and violet heeled boots that made her appear to rise as a natural extension of the carpet. The fact that her top had vivid yellow flowers on it also gave the impression that she was quite at home in this environment and it was indeed her natural habitat. The fact I needed shades to look at her for any length of time, made me hope that it would not be her interviewing me – or at least she might have a colleague to join her.
As she spoke through a type of intercom to the students in the room, she then turned her attention to me and was just about to start speaking when the door opened and in came Mr Plankton from the parking shenanigan earlier. I thought he was going to be the colleague, but as he began to speak in a somewhat nervous tone, it became clear that he was actually to be taking his driving theory test. But because he had come in after the others had started the test, he would either have to wait until the next group came and start with them or go away and re-appoint for a completely different day.
Any glee or victory I might have felt over him was now empty, as I looked at his sad and somewhat dejected expression coupled with his shock at seeing me again at all, let alone so soon. I almost felt maternal towards him – almost, but not quite. He had decided to wait and took a seat at the other end opposite the lockers. The woman now turned her attention back to me and gestured that we go to the room now to the left of where she was standing. The test itself lasted for 45 minutes and any time spent out in this tribute to bad design was therefore encroaching on my interview ’slot’
So we sat and talked – to be fair she talked and I listened. Although she furnished me with plenty of information I did not actually feel that we were getting anywhere, or whether I was any closer to procuring a new position. Waffling was by far her strongest point, but I had learnt from my previous job to discover what the position actually was going to be BEFORE I left the building. Thus eliminating that element of surprise, should I be successful.
Now as we sat, I took a guess at what I would be doing, and was wondering how I would be able to work in such a colourful place without gaining a lifetime prescription for migraine tablets – failing that a regular appointment at SeeClear the new opticians in the High Street. Suddenly she looked up and I saw a clock that I had not noticed before. Though I don’t know how I could possibly have missed it! The clockface could surely only be rivalled by that famous time teller housed with Big Ben in London. Size was everything to some people.
I became aware that she had asked me a question, but I had to be honest I didn’t have the foggiest idea what it was. So am I the only person who has ever been in this position at an interview, and how would I get out of it? Mr Plankton helped, by providing a distraction and asking how long would it be as he really had to get back. My maternal side slipped a notch or two, as I offered him a lift back to is office, which he said was out of town. But he might have to hang on, I added, as I negotiated my way out of a tight space.
The interviewer, who I now knew to be called Vi, coughed, and made a further point of checking the time, as in the room over the way, people were finishing and sitting back in their swivel chairs – one girl actually dared to allow herself a victory swivel in her chair upon completion of her test. The look of relief she wore was brighter than any wall in this entire building, a statement in itself!
Vi got up and headed to the door and beckoned me to follow her – it looked for now like I had got away with the whole question issue, but to thank Mr Plankton here would probably just confuse him, so I kept quiet. I looked to where Vi had gone to a printer and followed her over. She was retrieving Pass certificates from the printer, and then from another printer – letters to arrange new appointments. Oh how I felt for those who received that particular letter. Mr P was ushered into the room as others came out. I wished him all the best.
As I did this, Vi was offering me the job and I had agreed to be there the next morning for initial training.
The time was up.
Tags: Big Ben, High Street, opticians, plankton, swivel chair
